So Long and Thanks for all the Spins

Dear Spinning Instructor,

I no longer love you. Over these past couple of months I've become stronger, faster and more agile. My cardiovascular abilities are fantastic. My blood pressure is low and my heart rate remains steady. I feel as if I'm a better person.

You haven't changed a bit.

Now don't get me wrong, you seem a little more buff and stuff, but that's not the only reason why we spin. Some of us spin for social reasons, to learn new things about each other and grow as people. You've made no attempt to get to know any of us and I'm sick of it. You never laugh at my jokes, instead giving me these strange looks as if I should be pedaling faster. Can't you see that I have feelings too?

I know this must be hard for you, but I need to move on and find a new spinning instructor. Please don't be sad, I'm sure there will always be other students willing to accept your cold, detached spinning style, but they just aren't me. I feel like a different person from when you started teaching me to spin and I just can't continue with this facade. It's over.

Of course I realize it will be a tough transition to another spinning instructor. My legs may get a little less muscular. But sometimes in life you need to make sacrifices in order to succeed and I am willing to go the distance to find another instructor. It may be a long journey, but in the end I'll hope to find my spinning boddhisatva. If the new spinning instructor just happens to be a sexy female, well that would be nice too.

I'll miss you and your beautiful spinning style (and body). You really are quite a good cyclist, but not so much on the social stuff. I suppose a part of me will always love you and your spinning, but I will bury that deep in the catacombs of my mind. Maybe someday, when times have changed, we can work out, but it is not this day.

Love for the last time,

Brett Evans